Everyone Had A Better Beard Than Me....

[Or, I'll Never Smoke That Many Cigarettes In A Week Again]

Well, as promised I suppose I will give an abridged version of the events of the tour with Andrew....as I saw them. Turns out I didn't like anyone on the trip b/c their beard was better than mine. Actually, I loved everyone.....but they can take a hike with their sweet beardness.
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First of all.....let me just preface the account by saying that 'touring' is very different than 'vacationing.' I used it as a vacation, but I think I came up with a simple way to think of it:

Vacation = Taking it easy & seeing America.
Touring = Interstates & venues. Along with the practical "sleeping on some nice folks' floors"

Also, kudos to Andrew [and every other musician] for having stamina to not only do this for one week.....but for many weeks to several months at a time.

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Thursday, August 9th
Adam Hamilton rode along with us as we left Bruce and went to Memphis to see the amazing Daniel Johnston. The bad part: We were in the back, and I could only see Daniel when the KevinSmithWannabe would sway to his extreme left or extreme right. The good part: WE SAW DANIEL JOHNSTON.....LIVE.....IN MEMPHIS! Also, we were under the air conditioner, so it was only a lower level of hell.

We left the show....headed for West Memphis, and found a hotel about an hour or so into Arkansas. I was berated for not mentioning the Motel 6 until several miles down the road. Adam Hamilton and I may have snuggled during the night, but I'm not totally sure. But we did do manly....if not slightly homoerotic....shirtless hanging out.

Friday, August 10th
At the odd checkout time of 10:59am, the 3 of us left for a several hour trip to St. Louis. We ate lunch, chilled at a FedEx/Kinkos, and walked around the Arch for a few hours in St. Lewie. That night we were treated to seeing Theodore play their CD release show, as well as Bad Folk do a bad-ass job of playing tunes. We stayed with 3 of the dudes from Theodore, and called it an early night at about 4am.

Saturday, August 11th
We left that morning headed back for home. Andrew got a 64oz. D-Cup from the D-Mart full of soda. I think it still had some in it after the 6 or so hour trip. Andrew also has a bladder the size of a melon. Adam met his parents in Banner, and thus left the journey. After a couple hours of rest, Andrew had a show in Oxford. It was triple-booked or something like that, but at least he got to play for Zach & Bobby.

Sunday, August 12th
Around 3 or so, Andrew and I left Mississippi for the next week. We made it a ways west of St. Louis [yeah, we did some awful backtracking] and stopped at a Budget Inn. As Andrew was inside making arrangements (we were pretending he was the only one staying in the room, so I hid in the car), out of nowhere the wind just started blowing insanely, rocking the car. After pulling around to the back of the hotel, Andrew was almost knocked over by the wind......and the wind blew the glasses off my face. I knew we were about to die from The Twister. I managed to feel my way to the room and take our stuff....then came back down and managed to spot my glasses in the gravel---about 50 feet from where they left my face. We made a video or two of walking around in the impending storm and of Andrew playing some songs in the room.

Monday, August 13th
Because hotels are stupid.....we had to check out at 11am....with not a whole lot of sleep. But we pressed on, and headed for the land of Nebraska. We arrived in Kearney late that afternoon, and I loved it right away. The main street....the trains....and most of all the people. Andrew played to a great number of adoring fans and friends. After the show, we went to Lucas' house.....where they had the 'treehouse' deck. Many hours were spent passing the guitar around and everyone loving one another.


Tuesday, August 14th
After the wonderful night, we were treated to eggs & coffee, and said our goodbyes to Kearney. On to Omaha....several hours away. We got there pretty early and hung out at Side Street Music. Also at the bar, I regret turning down a shot of Rumpleminze from Kyle.....but I knew that I was there to work. Stupid video/documentary thing. At the end of the night Justin, or Midwest Dilemma, graciously offered us his couch and bed. I shouldn't have taken it b/c that had to be the best beard of the whole trip. I think Andrew was fighting his cats all night, too.....but I slept great.

Wednesday, August 15th
Along we traveld to DesMoines. We actually were really early, so we kinda went on past to Ames, Iowa and found the awesome Lincoln Lodge. Straight out of the 60s....as in that's probably the last time it was fixed up. Still, we got a good rate. When we headed back to DesMoines, by the time the show was to start only two people had paid. Just so the bar/employees wouldn't lose money by paying the bands....the show was basically cancelled. The most we did was get a shot of Andrew leaving the venue all sad and stuff. Nevertheless we headed back to the Lincoln Lodge. Oh, and there's not a Taco Bell to be seen ANYWHERE in Ames. At least we didn't. So after an hour of the Daily Show and the Colbert Report, Andrew did another intimate singer/songwriter session and we just sat around. We also speculated about why the door to the bathroom had a big hole in it. My guess was that it served as a faux gloryhole--either part of a fantasy or someone was experimenting to see what a gloryhole was like---and I guess Andrew pretended to shoot through the door with an invisible shotgun. I think both theories are valid.

Thursday, August 16th
We left Ames for the wonderful Minneapolis. Don't worry, I tried to record myself singing the Mary Tyler Moore theme.....so hopefully I can put it to the actual song and make myself happy. Although...as stated before.....we pretty much saw just a fraction of the downtown area, so no time for me to find the MTM statue and throw my hat in the air. I was also called 'homeboy' by a guy driving next to us in traffic. He was apparently from Memphis...and told me to enjoy the weather. He was nice. At the 400 Bar, we got to see the lovely JoAnna James play....and I also made her laugh by suggesting that Andrew should be a Hanes underwear model. ALSO....I decided to partake in the Rumpleminze that was offered in Omaha. Yeah, yummy stuff. I didn't get as drunk as Andrew.......who was stumbling around before taking the stage. I think. An awesome dude, Eric, I believe, bought us a gyro from the Mediterranean restaurant down the street. Man, that thing was gooood. He was really nice to do that. After having to don our jackets, we started our drive to Chicago. We didn't make it that far, maybe an hour or two, and stopped at the first rest area crossing into Wisconsin just before Andrew fell asleep at the wheel. So we got out our sleeping bags, wrapped ourselves, and settled into the ....well, front seats.

Friday, August 17th
Sleeping in a car is never fun.....no matter how much you save on hotel rooms. Awake at 8am or so by the blinding sunlight, we took our morning dumps and made out for Chicago. Again we drove most of the day...which most of was taken up by a traffic jam b/c of a wreck in Wisconsin, and a traffic jam in Chicago b/c it's Chicago. It took over an hour to travel two or three miles from the O'Hare Airport to the exit to get to Matt's house. Finally we got to Matt's house.......he was spending time with his mom so we sat outside his apartment for a couple of hours and played with his neighbors' dog. Then, he and Shanna arrived, Matt & Andrew had a long lovers' embrace, and we drank a few beers. The show was actually a house show, at Matt's so we were there for the rest of the night. JoelG made his way over....and it was a happy little reunion. I thought my parents had a big dog.......but Bronco, Matt & Shanna's dog....is a total behemoth of a dog. Absolutely adorable, though. Except for myself---I was taking it too easy, like a weiner-----everyone got completely hammered; it was awesome. I was really enjoying the Chicago night as well.

Saturday, August 18th
Well, I got to try a Chicago Deep-Dish pizza and see several blocks of Chicago before we left that afternoon---along for the ride home was JoelG---for Galena. I thought Galena, and basically that part of Illinois, was incredibly beautiful. It's really hilly, and old-school, but well-preserved I guess you could say. It's actually very touristy. Just a little TOO touristy, but still beautiful. It's a shame we got there right after dusk and couldn't see more of it. Andrew wrapped up his tour with three 45-minute sets (pretty daunting, actually) at the Grape Escape, and he, Joel, and myself packed up and started the 15 hour drive home. I only made it for two hours before letting Joel drive, as Andrew slept.

Sunday, August 19th
I awoke at 6am-ish as Joel had gotten us basically to St. Louis.....and we had breakfast at Denny's. Andrew took us on all the way to somewhere in Arkansas.....and I got us the rest of the way home. Yeah, I only got comfortable driving the closer I got to Mississippi. Plus, it wasn't my car so I was extra nervous. We dropped off Joel at his parents house, and then Andrew left me at my house. I slept the rest of the day.
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There you have it........I should have kept a journal for a better rememberance of the tour, but what I don't have on video I have somewhere in my heart. And you don't need to know about it, anyway.

So, thanks to all of you I met along the way for letting me meet you; my apologies also for you having to meet me.

And thanks Andrew.......maybe you'll let me go again sometime. Maybe I should actually try to work hard so I can feel like I deserve a week off of work again.